My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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