Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize