Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize