Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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