I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
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I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
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I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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