It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
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