Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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