now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i barfeds in our rink
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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