your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
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there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
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They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
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