The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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