We won't sleep together?
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
We just shotgunned beers for America
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I am mentally ready for anal.
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