Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize