Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
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