How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
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I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
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She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
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