know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
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