I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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