how hairy? two words: wookie tits
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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