All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
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