So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Randomize