Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
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