i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Randomize