You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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