a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
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