I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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