i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize