when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Help. Why am I so naked?
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