There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize