we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i used baking grease as lip gloss
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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