he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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