I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
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