I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
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I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
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He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
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