I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
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He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
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You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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