9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
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