yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Randomize