Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize