I got chris browned last night
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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