maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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