Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
please come you make the beer taste better
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize