i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
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and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
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But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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