Fine. I'll sleep in my office
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
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