We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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