Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
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My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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