sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
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