so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I forget how to act sober
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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