Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
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