i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize