3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
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