the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
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I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
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