im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
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Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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