I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
So squirting runs in the family.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize